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June 22 miss murder. <3...that's life. if nothing else, it's life. it's real and sometimes it fucking hurts, but it's sort of all we have. <3
Just sharing a little love with everyone. If you don't intend to think about what you're reading, then i don't reccomend you bother reading at all. i don't write these things just to read my own words.
Alice came to a fork in the road. "Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Sometimes I wish I could walk around with a HANDLE WITH CARE sign stuck to my forehead. Sometimes I wish that there were a way to let people know that just because I live in a world without rules, and in a life that is lawless, doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt so bad the morning after. Sometimes I think that I was forced to withdraw into depression because it was the only rightful protest I could throw in the face of a world that said it was alright for people to come and go as they please, that there were simply no real obligations left."
“I walk around the school hallways and look at the people. I look at the teachers and wonder why they're here. If they like their jobs. Or us. And I wonder how smart they were when they were fifteen. Not in a mean way. In a curious way. It's like looking at all the students and wondering who's had their heart broken that day, and how they are able to cope with having three quizzes and a book report due on top of that. Or wondering who did the heart breaking. And wondering why.”
Ingrid: "Don't attach yourself to anyone who shows you the least bit of attention because you're lonely. Loneliness is the human condition. No one is ever going to fill that space. The best you can do is know yourself... know what you want." "It's the sense of touch. In any real city, you walk, you know? You brush past people, people bump into you. In L.A., nobody touches you. We're always behind this metal and glass. I think we miss that touch so much, that we crash into each other, just so we can feel something." "I step forward and I hug her. There is emotion in the hug, and there is respect and a form of love. Emotion that comes from honesty, respect that comes from challenge, and the form of love that exists between people whose minds have touched, whose hearts have touched, whose souls have touched."
I don't know if it's the onset of summer, the change in my surroundings or the fact that i'm off my meds, but everything seems to be appearing in a strangely calm new light. I don't think the reason for this "convert" if you will, is necessarily important, but I'd like to thank whatever or whoever helped the change occur. Life seems lighter, I like that.
March 28 i'm waiting for something to go wrong.
♥ i want to fit. i want to fit and wear snappy clothes and follow the atkins diet and run three miles a day and keep myself well groomed and get a normal job and buy fancy stuff and follow my leaders blindly and just nod my head and walk into the meat grinder with a shiny white smile as my body is crushed into meal for the masses to follow in my footsteps. ♥
(thank you to ms.kate for sending this to me, i love it.)
as for a little lightheartedness... david smith & myself did drunken madlibs. 1. Apon reaching the tall, fuzzy sign in front of the campground, my parents took my photo. OH SNAP!! they yelled as I pooped on my nasal passage with my sister's right elbow. Later on I checked into my lodge, and it became nightfall. We began telling poopy stories about a canada that rails people. Fogal got so scared that he began to shake and murmur 'gay assholes '. We got worried and brought him to the whore. 2. newmarket is now safe thanks to a mysterious caped hero who calls himself slimy man. Dr. smelly had a sinister plan to turn newmarket into a crime infested town. With slimy's ability to thrust faster than a penis, Dr. smelly had no chance in defeating him man to man, so smelly set a trap with his death ray capable of seizureing boobs in a matter of seconds. slimy man entered the ware house, unaware of the death ray pointed at his head 'I've got you now slimy, newmarket is as good as mine!' Just then slimy man using his gecko like agility, leaped the distance of 4 condoms striking the death ray to the ground. 'that's it Dr. smelly'. Yelled slimy. I'm taking you down town. No wait! I just wanted to be your sticky cat poop, like in the movies. I never meant to hurt you, honestly! Tell it to the judge Dr. smelly, 'cause I don't care. 3. Once apon a time there was a princess named snow white. The evil which, jealous of white, made a poisonous chow mein which would cause the victim to drink after eating it. The magical beer bottle on the wall provided the recipe for this evil invention. Even though the plan seemed flawless, only 1 thing could wake up snow white. 3 of the dwarfs, drunk, sexy, and really sexxy had no idea what would stop the curse. 7 years went by until one day harry potter was in town promoting his(her) latest birth control when (s)he happened to sucking the dick of Snow White, lifting her from her curse. She suddenly stopped drinking with a blank stare. YE BWOI!! Yelled Snow, looking down at her watch. I missed the the jays game. 'Oh well' she sighed. There's always bags.
January 30 overdue quotes. <3♥ Take heart sweetheart, or I will take it from you. ♥ Looking kind of anxious in your cross armed stance, like a bad tempered prom queen at a homecoming dance. ♥ Your gun went off, well you shot off your mouth and look where it got you. ♥ My halo is bent, it’s a fat fucking lie, and so the abstract motor gives in, it says “at least I tried.” ♥ So take your cold, cold heart and drown, and don’t forget to take deep breaths. ♥ I won’t stand in your way, let your hatred grow & she’ll scream and she’ll shout and she’ll pray, and she had a name. yea.. She HAD a name. ♥ You said it makes you fall in love, or be smart enough to keep your distance. ♥ Tonight tenants range from: a lawyer and a virgin ♥ Make a move on me baby, I can’t be the one who’s always taking chances. ♥ If you could spare one of your nine lives, we could ditch this coast get in my car and drive. ♥ In vain I blame my trembling on the cold air, but I can’t hide that I relied on you like yellow does on blue. ♥ And all these lines fall short of what I had in mind, a failed attempt to capsulize a feeling. ♥ The truth is, you could slit my throat and with my one last gasping breath, I’d apologize for bleeding on your shirt. ♥ You kiss me like an overdramatic actor who’s starving for work with one last chance to make it happen. ♥ I wanted to walk through the empty streets and feel something constant under my feet. ♥ Your bedroom behaviour was never more then checkmarks on bedposts. ♥ Just give me one little second, and I will try my hardest, to make you feel like I’m someone else. ♥ I want to take you far from the cynics in this town, and kiss you on the mouth. ♥ I know you’re wise beyond your years, but do you ever get the fear…that your perfect verse, is just a lie you tell yourself to help you get by? ♥ She wants a better body and some super model moves. ♥ You are all kinds of beautiful ♥ I will breathe in a moment, as long as I keep my distance. I wouldn’t want to go messing anything up. ♥ I’ve got you out on a wire, you be love and I’ll be a liar. ♥ Smile big for everyone, even when you know what they’ve done. January 23 what do you have to say for yourself?♥ [[say anything - admit it.]] ♥
admit it! you spend your time sitting in circles with your friends, pontificating to each other,
♥ amen.♥ November 28 survery majiggy.i got bored so i did this thingy.
GENERAL Blog name = ((titles are overrated.)) # piercings = 7 # tattoos = 5 height = 5'8" hair color = bleach blonde.. but it's been every colour in the book. siblings = 0 children = 0 How old do you look = i'd say i look about my age How old do you act = i'm still living out my younger teenage party years, so 16? How old do you feel = 18 Do you have any pets = cat, guinea pig & horses
LAST... movie you rented = skeleton key movie you bought = lords of dogtown song you listened to = i write sins not tragedies + panic! at the disco song that was stuck in your head = am to pm + christina millian cd you bought = bob marley greatest hits tv show you've watched = dr.phil
DO... you have a secret crush = is not so secret cuhz im going out with him you wish you could live somewhere else = yes, puerto plata, or i'd even settle for "our" house on davis. you think about suicide = & leave him? are you crazy... you believe in online dating = Cheesy. others find you attractive = Uh….sometimes i suppose you like cleaning = it's an obsession. you like roller coasters = Yes
FOR OR AGAINST... long distance relationships = depends on how far using someone = against, and shame on anyone who does. smoking = definitely for. Death penalty = depends on whether the person was proven to be guilty with absolutely no doubt, no innocent people need to be killed for crimes they didn't commit.
HAVE YOU... ever lied to someone? = who hasnt? ever been in a fist fight? = besides the college manor smackdown?..one or two. ever passed out on a street from drinking too much? = Never. ever told someone you loved them when you didnt? = No. Say what you mean and mean what you say. ever cheated on a lover/spouse? = yes and i feel bad, but i don't believe in regrets. ever cheated on a test? = yes and i got caught for it too.
WHAT... shoes do you wear most= my runners, flip flops in the summer.. recently, my slipper shoes. are you scared of = everything including my own shadow. do you want to be when you grow up = psychologist, mom, kickass wife is your least favorite chore to do = dishes makes you the happiest = dave, girls nights with amanda upsets you the most = when people lie or are insensitve always makes you smile = daves silly attempts to make me laugh
NUMBER... of times I have been in love = 2 of hearts I have broken = ...dont wanna say...i still feel slightly remorseful. of people I can trust with my life with = 2 of times my name has appeared in the newspaper = once or twice.. im not that important lol of scars on my body = too many to count of things in my past that I regret = i don't believe in regret. of times I told people I loved them today = i dont know how many times i told dave i loved him today...
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE... pretty = umm average funny = i have my moments friendly = yea amusing = or so people say.. ugly = depends on the day loveable = i guess.. caring = yes sweet = sometimes sensitive = yup! a putz = i'd like to think not.. mean = sometimes, only if u really upset me
FAVORITE... 6 letter word = douche Candy = m&ms Cartoon = Family Guy, Simpsons Cereal = frosted flakes Color = pink, black, & brown Day of week = saturday Season = Fall Movie = Crash, the skeleton ke, viva la bam, wild boys Book = The DaVinci Code - Dan Brown, The Perks - stephen chbosky, prozac nation TV Channel = A&E, TLC
PERSON WHO LAST... Slept in your bed with you = dave Saw you cry = cant remember.. Made you cry = dave Yelled at you = My mom Smiled at you = My dad Kissed you = dave
HAVE YOU EVER... Gone out in public in your pajamas = oh hell yes Kept a secret from everyone = yes Wished you were the opposite sex = not in a million. Stolen someone's newspaper = no..what a weird question Borrowed something never meaning to return it = nope Had sex with some one of the same sex = Absolutly..Not!
LOVE Do you believe in love at first sight = nothing so complicated could ever be that simple Most important quality to you in a relationship is = trust, honesty,& loyalty Who loves you most = my mother
MISCELLANEOUS INFO Do you speak any other languages = a little spanish Last flavor you tasted = diet coke Last noise you heard = amanda laughing Last smell you sniffed = amandas atomic fluff on my bed, my lord. Last meal you ate = pizza Last beautiful thing you saw = his smile sunday morning Last emotion you felt = stress Favorite item in your home = computer Worst feeling in the world = being helpless
FINISH THIS SENTENCE: I Love ...girl nights. I Miss ... dave ♡ I Wish ...i was back in dominican I Hope ... this headache will go away. I Want ... to be with him. I am ... about to watch a movie with ms.micks I need ...something to amuse me I'd rather die than lick ...a used condom found at a random party. (it's the worst thing amanda & i could come up with.) November 23 quotes¬e.♥ don't you get ahead of me & i won't leave you behind. ♥ it was your hello that kept me hanging on every word & your goodbye that keeps me listening for your voice around each corner. ♥ i don't know what i was thinking, til i was thinking of you; i don't remember a thing until i opened my eyes & you came into view. ♥ please never look back & don't look back, because you'll never forget why you cried. ♥ joke me something awful, just like kisses on the neck of "best friends". ♥ the best things in life can't be seen, that's why we close our eyes when we kiss, cry & dream. ♥ it may sound ubsurd, but don't be niave..even heros have the right to bleed. ♥ it's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance, it's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance - it's the one who won't be taken, who can not seem to give & the soul afraid of dying, that never learns to live. ♥ i don't know how i got this way, i know it's not alright - so i'm breaking the habit, tonight. ♥ i've waited all my life to cross this line, to the only thing that's true - so i will not hide it's time to try anything to be with you. all my life i've waited, this is true. ♥ everytime you walk into the room, i'm afraid to move. ♥ it's easier to run; replacing this pain with something numb. ♥ & i need you now, somehow. ♥ imagine passion, in my head the flesh seems thicker & you're my obsession, i love you to the bones. ♥ you're wasting your time if you're trying to impress me, i waste all my time just thinking of you. ♥ if i kiss you on the neck, will you slit my throat? ♥ when i say let's keep in touch, i really mean i wish that you'd grow up. ♥ i'm in love with the world, through the eyes of a girl. ♥ never is a promise & you can't afford to lie. ♥ i've been bad bad girl, i've been careless with a delicate man - well it's a sad sad world, when a girl will break a boy, just because she can. ♥ just one chance, just one breath - just in case there's just one left. ♥ i love you, i loved you all along. i miss you, from far away for far too long. ♥ the rooms have a hint of asbestos and maybe just dash of formaldehyde & the habit of decomposing right before your very (lalala) eyes. ♥ swear to shake it up, if you swear to listen. oh, we're still so young, desperate for attention. i aim to be your eyes, trophy boys, trophy wives ♥ so let's get these teen hearts beating, faster. faster. Swear to shake it up, if you swear to listen October 17 beautifulyou can feel his heartbeat through his fingertips, |
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