miss♥eve's profile((titles are overrated.)...PhotosBlog Tools Help
Photo 1 of 20

eve

Occupation
Location
how about you just assume a little about me? you're going to anyways...
June 22

miss murder. <3

...that's life. if nothing else, it's life. it's real and sometimes it fucking hurts, but it's sort of all we have.

<3

 

Just sharing a little love with everyone. If you don't intend to think about what you're reading, then i don't reccomend you bother reading at all. i don't write these things just to read my own words.

 

Alice came to a fork in the road. "Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.
"I don't know," Alice answered.
"Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."
((Alice in Wonderland))

 

"Sometimes I wish I could walk around with a HANDLE WITH CARE sign stuck to my forehead. Sometimes I wish that there were a way to let people know that just because I live in a world without rules, and in a life that is lawless, doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt so bad the morning after. Sometimes I think that I was forced to withdraw into depression because it was the only rightful protest I could throw in the face of a world that said it was alright for people to come and go as they please, that there were simply no real obligations left."
((Prozac Nation))

 

“I walk around the school hallways and look at the people. I look at the teachers and wonder why they're here. If they like their jobs. Or us. And I wonder how smart they were when they were fifteen. Not in a mean way. In a curious way. It's like looking at all the students and wondering who's had their heart broken that day, and how they are able to cope with having three quizzes and a book report due on top of that. Or wondering who did the heart breaking. And wondering why.”
((The Perks))

 

Ingrid: "Don't attach yourself to anyone who shows you the least bit of attention because you're lonely. Loneliness is the human condition. No one is ever going to fill that space. The best you can do is know yourself... know what you want."
((White Oleander)) 

"It's the sense of touch. In any real city, you walk, you know? You brush past people, people bump into you. In L.A., nobody touches you. We're always behind this metal and glass. I think we miss that touch so much, that we crash into each other, just so we can feel something."
((Crash))

"I step forward and I hug her. There is emotion in the hug, and there is respect and a form of love. Emotion that comes from honesty, respect that comes from challenge, and the form of love that exists between people whose minds have touched, whose hearts have touched, whose souls have touched."
((A Million Little Pieces))

 

I don't know if it's the onset of summer, the change in my surroundings or the fact that i'm off my meds, but everything seems to be appearing in a strangely calm new light. I don't think the reason for this "convert" if you will, is necessarily important, but I'd like to thank whatever or whoever helped the change occur. Life seems lighter, I like that.

 

 

March 28

i'm waiting for something to go wrong.

 

i want to fit. i want to fit and wear snappy clothes and follow the atkins diet and run three miles a day and keep myself well groomed and get a normal job and buy fancy stuff and follow my leaders blindly and just nod my head and walk into the meat grinder with a shiny white smile as my body is crushed into meal for the masses to follow in my footsteps.

i want to get married to someone whom i never disagree with and have 'intercourse' with exactly twice a week, with an extra session on my birthday and whenever i get a raise or buy an expensive gift made by children in sweatshops who i feel especially sorry for when the guy with the white beard comes on the TV and tells me about how much my pennies a day could help them.

i want to wear nice pants and have a leather wallet with lots of pockets for my credit cars and a fold-out section for the picture of my 2.5 children.

i want to name my children after relatives whom i secretly despise and raise them by taking all of the prescribed steps in all the right books and alienate them after they grow out of my control and begin forming their own opinions and begin to act like i did when i was young and stupid.

i want to have a midlife crisis.

i want to cheat on my wife and regret every decision i have made since i began making decisions and fall asleep each night under my billion thread count Nordstrom angle-down comforter fearing the day when i make a mistake and lose every material possession that i have ever worked so hard to secure in order to buffer myself from the world around me.

i want to be a prozac junkie and have a few heart attacks and live on social security in a retirement village and go to the clubhouse on friday for a potluck and play cards with old men who smell like mold.

i want to get shipped off to a nursing home and shit myself as the doctors add tubes and wires to my body in hope of preserving my suffering for as long as humanly possible.

i want to die frightened and alone in the middle of the night as the nurses attempt to resuscitate me with electrical shocks to the heart, filling my veins with synthetic jesus blood.

i want to be buried in a pretty cemetery with a fountain and trees and footpaths, surrounded by family members who tell each other that i accomplished so much.



 

(thank you to ms.kate for sending this to me, i love it.)

 

as for a little lightheartedness...

david smith & myself did drunken madlibs.
enjoy.


1. Apon reaching the tall, fuzzy sign in front of the campground, my parents took my photo. OH SNAP!! they yelled as I pooped on my nasal passage with my sister's right elbow. Later on I checked into my lodge, and it became nightfall. We began telling poopy stories about a canada that rails people. Fogal got so scared that he began to shake and murmur 'gay assholes '. We got worried and brought him to the whore.

2. newmarket is now safe thanks to a mysterious caped hero who calls himself slimy man. Dr. smelly had a sinister plan to turn newmarket into a crime infested town. With slimy's ability to thrust faster than a penis, Dr. smelly had no chance in defeating him man to man, so smelly set a trap with his death ray capable of seizureing boobs in a matter of seconds. slimy man entered the ware house, unaware of the death ray pointed at his head 'I've got you now slimy, newmarket is as good as mine!' Just then slimy man using his gecko like agility, leaped the distance of 4 condoms striking the death ray to the ground. 'that's it Dr. smelly'. Yelled slimy. I'm taking you down town. No wait! I just wanted to be your sticky cat poop, like in the movies. I never meant to hurt you, honestly! Tell it to the judge Dr. smelly, 'cause I don't care.

3. Once apon a time there was a princess named snow white. The evil which, jealous of white, made a poisonous chow mein which would cause the victim to drink after eating it. The magical beer bottle on the wall provided the recipe for this evil invention. Even though the plan seemed flawless, only 1 thing could wake up snow white. 3 of the dwarfs, drunk, sexy, and really sexxy had no idea what would stop the curse. 7 years went by until one day harry potter was in town promoting his(her) latest birth control when (s)he happened to sucking the dick of Snow White, lifting her from her curse. She suddenly stopped drinking with a blank stare. YE BWOI!! Yelled Snow, looking down at her watch. I missed the the jays game. 'Oh well' she sighed. There's always bags.

 

 

 

January 30

overdue quotes. <3

Take heart sweetheart, or I will take it from you.

Looking kind of anxious in your cross armed stance, like a bad tempered prom queen at a homecoming dance.

Your gun went off, well you shot off your mouth and look where it got you.

My halo is bent, it’s a fat fucking lie, and so the abstract motor gives in, it says “at least I tried.”

So take your cold, cold heart and drown, and don’t forget to take deep breaths.

♥ I won’t stand in your way, let your hatred grow & she’ll scream and she’ll shout and she’ll pray, and she had a name. yea.. She HAD a name.

You said it makes you fall in love, or be smart enough to keep your distance.

Tonight tenants range from: a lawyer and a virgin
Accessorizing with a rosary tucked inside her lingerie
She's getting a job at the firm come Monday.
The Mrs. will stay with the cheating attorney
moonlighting aside, she really needs his money.
Oh, wonderful caricature of intimacy.

Make a move on me baby, I can’t be the one who’s always taking chances.

If you could spare one of your nine lives, we could ditch this coast get in my car and drive.

In vain I blame my trembling on the cold air, but I can’t hide that I relied on you like yellow does on blue.

And all these lines fall short of what I had in mind, a failed attempt to capsulize a feeling.

The truth is, you could slit my throat and with my one last gasping breath, I’d apologize for bleeding on your shirt.

You kiss me like an overdramatic actor who’s starving for work with one last chance to make it happen.

I wanted to walk through the empty streets and feel something constant under my feet.

Your bedroom behaviour was never more then checkmarks on bedposts.

Just give me one little second, and I will try my hardest, to make you feel like I’m someone else.

I want to take you far from the cynics in this town, and kiss you on the mouth.

I know you’re wise beyond your years, but do you ever get the fear…that your perfect verse, is just a lie you tell yourself to help you get by?

She wants a better body and some super model moves.
Cuz in her head she's always been the ugly one.
Well hey, we think we're ugly too.
And it's true that we will never know
all of the things that she could have known.
Well I wonder when she thought it was that she would win?
Cuz man she got so thin.

You are all kinds of beautiful

I will breathe in a moment, as long as I keep my distance. I wouldn’t want to go messing anything up.

I’ve got you out on a wire, you be love and I’ll be a liar.

Smile big for everyone, even when you know what they’ve done.

January 23

what do you have to say for yourself?

♥ [[say anything - admit it.]] ♥

 

admit it!
despite your pseudo-bohemian appearance & vaguely leftist doctrine of beliefs,
you know nothing about art or sex, that you couldn’t read in any trendy New York underground fashion magazine
prototypical non-conformist, you are a vacuous soldier of the thrift store Gestapo.
you adhere to a set of standards and tastes that appear to be determined by an unseen panel of hipster judges (bullshit) giving a thumbs up or thumbs down to incoming and outgoing trends and styles of music and art.
go analog baby, you’re so post-modern.
you’re diving face forward into a antiquated path,
it’s disgusting, its offensive, don’t stick your nose up at me.

you spend your time sitting in circles with your friends, pontificating to each other,
forever competing for that one moment of self-aggrandizing glory in which you hog the intellectual spotlight, holding dominion over the entire shallow pointless conversation.
oh, we’re not worthy.
when you walk by a group of quote-unquote normal people, you chuckle to yourself patting yourself on the back as you scoff; it's the same superiority complex shared by the high school jocks who made your life a living hell & makes you a slave to the competitive capitalist dogma you spend every moment of your waking life bitching about.
well let me tell you this, i am shamelessly self-involved.
i spend hours in front of the mirror, making my hair elegantly disheveled.
i self medicate with drugs and alcohol to treat my extreme social anxiety.
cause I’m proud of my life and the things that I have done,
proud of myself and the loner I’ve become.
you’re free to whine, it will not get you far, i do just fine, with my car and my guitar.

 

♥ amen.♥

November 28

survery majiggy.

i got bored so i did this thingy.

 

 

 

GENERAL

Blog name = ((titles are overrated.))

# piercings = 7

# tattoos = 5

height = 5'8"

hair color = bleach blonde.. but it's been every colour in the book.

siblings = 0

children = 0

How old do you look = i'd say i look about my age

How old do you act = i'm still living out my younger teenage party years, so 16?

How old do you feel = 18

Do you have any pets = cat, guinea pig & horses

 

LAST...

movie you rented = skeleton key

movie you bought = lords of dogtown

song you listened to = i write sins not tragedies + panic! at the disco

song that was stuck in your head = am to pm + christina millian

cd you bought = bob marley greatest hits

tv show you've watched = dr.phil

 

DO...

you have a secret crush = is not so secret cuhz im going out with him

you wish you could live somewhere else = yes, puerto plata, or i'd even settle for "our" house on davis.

you think about suicide = & leave him? are you crazy...

you believe in online dating = Cheesy.

others find you attractive = Uh….sometimes i suppose

you like cleaning = it's an obsession.

you like roller coasters = Yes

 

FOR OR AGAINST...

long distance relationships = depends on how far

using someone = against, and shame on anyone who does.

smoking = definitely for.

Death penalty = depends on whether the person was proven to be guilty with absolutely no doubt, no innocent people need to be killed for crimes they didn't commit.

 

HAVE YOU...

ever lied to someone? = who hasnt?

ever been in a fist fight? = besides the college manor smackdown?..one or two.

ever passed out on a street from drinking too much? = Never.

ever told someone you loved them when you didnt? = No. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

ever cheated on a lover/spouse? = yes and i feel bad, but i don't believe in regrets.

ever cheated on a test? = yes and i got caught for it too.

 

WHAT...

shoes do you wear most= my runners, flip flops in the summer.. recently, my slipper shoes.

are you scared of = everything including my own shadow.

do you want to be when you grow up = psychologist, mom, kickass wife

is your least favorite chore to do = dishes

makes you the happiest = dave, girls nights with amanda

upsets you the most = when people lie or are insensitve

always makes you smile = daves silly attempts to make me laugh

 

NUMBER...

of times I have been in love = 2

of hearts I have broken = ...dont wanna say...i still feel slightly remorseful.

of people I can trust with my life with = 2

of times my name has appeared in the newspaper = once or twice.. im not that important lol

of scars on my body = too many to count

of things in my past that I regret = i don't believe in regret.

of times I told people I loved them today = i dont know how many times i told dave i loved him today...

 

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE...

pretty = umm average 

funny = i have my moments

friendly = yea

amusing = or so people say..

ugly = depends on the day

loveable = i guess..

caring = yes

sweet = sometimes

sensitive = yup!

a putz = i'd like to think not..

mean = sometimes, only if u really upset me

 

FAVORITE...

6 letter word = douche

Candy = m&ms

Cartoon = Family Guy, Simpsons

Cereal = frosted flakes

Color = pink, black, & brown

Day of week = saturday 

Season = Fall

Movie = Crash, the skeleton ke, viva la bam, wild boys 

Book = The DaVinci Code - Dan Brown, The Perks - stephen chbosky, prozac nation

TV Channel = A&E, TLC

 

PERSON WHO LAST...

Slept in your bed with you = dave

Saw you cry = cant remember..

Made you cry = dave

Yelled at you = My mom

Smiled at you = My dad

Kissed you = dave

 

HAVE YOU EVER...

Gone out in public in your pajamas = oh hell yes

Kept a secret from everyone = yes

Wished you were the opposite sex = not in a million.

Stolen someone's newspaper = no..what a weird question

Borrowed something never meaning to return it = nope

Had sex with some one of the same sex = Absolutly..Not!

 

LOVE

Do you believe in love at first sight = nothing so complicated could ever be that simple

Most important quality to you in a relationship is = trust, honesty,& loyalty

Who loves you most = my mother

 

MISCELLANEOUS INFO

Do you speak any other languages = a little spanish

Last flavor you tasted = diet coke

Last noise you heard = amanda laughing

Last smell you sniffed = amandas atomic fluff on my bed, my lord.

Last meal you ate = pizza

Last beautiful thing you saw = his smile sunday morning 

Last emotion you felt = stress

Favorite item in your home = computer

Worst feeling in the world = being helpless

 

FINISH THIS SENTENCE:

I Love ...girl nights.

I Miss ... dave ♡

I Wish ...i was back in dominican

I Hope ... this headache will go away. 

I Want ... to be with him. 

I am ... about to watch a movie with ms.micks

I need ...something to amuse me 

I'd rather die than lick ...a used condom found at a random party. (it's the worst thing amanda & i could come up with.) 

November 23

quotes&note.

♥ don't you get ahead of me & i won't leave you behind.

♥ it was your hello that kept me hanging on every word & your goodbye that keeps me listening for your voice around each corner.

♥ i don't know what i was thinking, til i was thinking of you; i don't remember a thing until i opened my eyes & you came into view.

♥ please never look back & don't look back, because you'll never forget why you cried.

♥ joke me something awful, just like kisses on the neck of "best friends".

♥ the best things in life can't be seen, that's why we close our eyes when we kiss, cry & dream.

♥ it may sound ubsurd, but don't be niave..even heros have the right to bleed.

♥ it's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance, it's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance - it's the one who won't be taken, who can not seem to give & the soul afraid of dying, that never learns to live.

♥ i don't know how i got this way, i know it's not alright - so i'm breaking the habit, tonight.

♥ i've waited all my life to cross this line, to the only thing that's true - so i will not hide it's time to try anything to be with you. all my life i've waited, this is true.

♥ everytime you walk into the room, i'm afraid to move.
♥ close my eyes, let the whole thing pass me by, i need to let go of this pride.

♥ it's easier to run; replacing this pain with something numb.

♥ & i need you now, somehow.

♥ imagine passion, in my head the flesh seems thicker & you're my obsession, i love you to the bones.

♥ you're wasting your time if you're trying to impress me, i waste all my time just thinking of you.

♥ if i kiss you on the neck, will you slit my throat?

♥ when i say let's keep in touch, i really mean i wish that you'd grow up.

♥ i'm in love with the world, through the eyes of a girl.

♥ never is a promise & you can't afford to lie.

♥ i've been bad bad girl, i've been careless with a delicate man - well it's a sad sad world, when a girl will break a boy, just because she can.

♥ just one chance, just one breath - just in case there's just one left.

♥ i love you, i loved you all along. i miss you, from far away for far too long.

♥ the rooms have a hint of asbestos and maybe just dash of formaldehyde & the habit of decomposing right before your very (lalala) eyes.

♥ swear to shake it up, if you swear to listen. oh, we're still so young, desperate for attention. i aim to be your eyes, trophy boys, trophy wives
♥ well, she's not bleeding on the ballroom floor just for the attention.

♥ so let's get these teen hearts beating, faster. faster. Swear to shake it up, if you swear to listen
♥ haven't you heard that i'm the new cancer, never looked better & you can't stand it.
♥  i go around a time or two, just to waste my time with you.
♥ all the windows swear to miss you & the doors are cellb lock tight.


the real deal?
i don't like you, i've never liked you or any of "them" for that matter.
it's easy to wake up in the morning & paint on those smiles of yours, it's easy to believe in yourself so much that you start to doubt every move you make...
but me? i'd prefer to show people who i really am.
because when i get old & i look back on life, i'd rather know that people loved or hated me for ME, not for the person that i created to make it through these years.
i almost pity you and all of them because really, you're not living. you're posing..like store manaquins in ridiculous clothing with "nouveau" sayings & wasted intelligence.
i just wanted to make it known, anonymous or not:
i'm not jealous of you, far from it. i hope one day you'll learn that it's not worth the wasted effort to be what "they" want you to be, because who you are is probably a lot better.
you & them.. as the people you are now, are just translucent, so obviously attention-starved &  pathetic.
it's snowing, it's almost christmas & i feel alive.
bet you can't say the same lovies. ♥ xo

October 17

beautiful

you can feel his heartbeat through his fingertips,
the way he touches you so lightly.

he traces the outline of your ribs, your stomach, the marks on your waist.
"you're so beautiful," he breathes,
a tremor in his voice that echoes in his hands.
your mind is telling you he's a liar.
"how can you call this beauty?" you ask him,
pleading for some proof that might silence the constant self-hatred.
his heartbeat is deafening.
"you're beautiful like a downpour."
he brushes the hair from your eyes.
"you're beautiful the way a symphony is beautiful,
and the way the sky is beautiful

after the stars have disappeared
and all that's left is sky, endless, beautiful sky."
he's crying now, and he kisses you.
he whispers,
"you're beautiful like a eulogy."